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Sunday, August 15, 2004

Well I opened my life up and was slapped in the face! I guess I'm to be single for ever! Not that I was looking for a relationship, I was played big time! I some times wonder how men do what they do, How some can so easily play with others emotions! I'm luck I guess to have found out that this guy was not for me! An example! He says I have to stay in to rest busy work schedule! Ok that's fine! I see him at a bar with another guy! Not ok! He ignores me I'm confused very upset! He was the one saying I love you Your my boyfriend and so on! Well no calls I called a few times said my peace, no respect I don't know! Like I said I guess I'm lucky I found out what he was really like before I fell to much for him! I'm pissed that I let my self be so distracted by him! I'm also surprised at how lonely I really truly am! Its just a big huge reminder! Really it was I don't think I really wanted to be reminded of that fact really I didn't..Now I find my self pondering whether I will ever meet a man who truly wants to be with me for who I am! I think I'm a good guy with a big heart and lots to offer, I would give anything to meet the man for me! Is he out there I'm not sure as of late, Funny I was not even in the mind set until this bad boy came into my life! Its just fucked to because he was really not my type persay and I gave him a chance stupid stupid me,I refuse to become bitter! I do...Although that is becoming increasingly more difficult to do the more time goes by that I'm alone!

A tear in my eye, A pillow to hold...Why do I hurt like this I'm freaking angry at the world! I only want to be loved is that to much to ask for! At the same time I think its just to easy to be by my self!


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