<$BlogRSDUrl$> Gay Canadian X Party Boy

Sunday, April 25, 2004

This is a re post of an entry I made to my Blog April 17 2003, I think its worth seeing again! I have a feeling that many who have been reading my blog may not have read some of the early posts, This one was about one of my first sex nights from the park the one in Kamloops I wrote about on April 19 2004....
I miss that place the more I think about it the more I'm longing for that simple life of years gone by!
By the way My year long anniversary of blogging came and gone and I didn't even say anything! Truth is I just realized it! I'm not the fastest cookie out there but I tell ya I'm a cute one so that makes up for it HaaaHaaaaa!
April 10 2003 to April 10 2004!!!

One year and I'm here and Queer as hell and proud So Cheers to every Gay boy and Girl out there and Don't forget take care of your selves because your worth it so don't forget it K ok now read on about my crazy life and be happy!


Thursday, April 17, 2003


Just to warn some who may be offended by sexual situations should not read this entry.....

As I said here is more about my past from where I left of on Wednesday April 09,


So after I met Trevor things never where the same for me, because of the several years I was in the closet I had allot of life to live or catch up on, its like I had to make up for all the lost experiences from my teen age years and early adult hood. Like I said there where the monthly dances and I went to every one of them, I don't really remember much about it but some how I learned about a local cruising spot, in a park. A cruising spot is a place that gay men go to meet most often late at night and in the midst of the public. Its a odd kind of place, its known by the gay community and of course the authorities...Well one of the first nights I went was a few months after the first dance and I had given up on Trevor for good...He was my first love and I had got myself very confused about him, so I found the park...It was still cold and wintry but I went anyway the pull to go and meet other gay men was very strong....I wonder what my life would of been like if I only had known about such a spot when I was younger, a place that I had been so many times and known nothing about all the gay men around me and I never thought a place could exist. So it was sometime late at night and I met this guy...I was hiding in the bushes and he kept pulling up in his truck and walking around and then coming back, I think that I had seen him before....Well after being disappointed that hardly anyone came to the park except a few old men that jerked of in there cars and when I walked around they followed me around like some desperate sad men.....I was going crazy wanting to meet other guys and eventually this guy in the truck came up to me and asked me to leave with him so I did.....He was in his late twenties I think. I remember driving to his place while he was smoking a joint, I declined and we arrived at his house....I noticed a ring around his finger and asked about it he said nothing .....You have to think about the fact that this was the second guy I had met and it was in a park in the middle of the night, so I was very nervous but at the same time excited and very very wanting to explore my sexuality.....When we got in his house I looked around and thought that he must not live here alone....He said he had a roommate and he was out of town....The first thing he did was put some porno video on and offered me some beer, I drank them as fast as I could to try and calm my nerves....I remember sitting there and looking at him...He was really hot and I couldn't believe that a guy like him would want to be with me....He was very muscular and manly looking....He lit up another joint and I said no again, pot makes me crazy paranoid and that's the last situation I wanted to be in Hi on pot with a guy I didn't know....So I had no Idea what to do next...Its not like I had picked up guys at the park before.....I'll never forget how the rest of the night went and how it left me feeling....It was after al the second guy I had ever met in my gay life....He took my hand a led me up the stairs to his room, it was very dark, next thing I new I was in his bed..Wow I had no idea what to do and this guy was very aggressive with me....I remember looking up at him as he was standing up above me naked and jerking of....Next thing I know he is bent over the bed and I'm standing behind him...By this time all my clothes where of....He pulled out some lube at this point in my life I really was naive....Well he kept asking me what do you want to do with your dick over and over....I just stood there almost in shock over what was going on....This guy was out of it on pot and booze....Some how I ended on the bed again with him standing above me again....The guy was very built and he was aware of it he kept saying you like what you see don't you you like a hot muscle guy, you like looking at a man don't you you like my dick you like a big muscle guy don't you .....I was so nervous I couldn't get an erection.....Well before I could even get into it he was done...I remember he was jerking of really hard...Next thing I know he is done and I'm told to get dressed and we go down stairs.....He didn't really say anything.....I didn't know what to say....and was thinking is that it hmmmm,it's not like I was totally inept about what sex should be like but this was not what I expected.....The next thing he does is offer to call me a cab and say that he would like to see me again...I didn't know what to think.....He then gave me 10 dollars to pay for the cab....My god did I feel used suddenly.....And very discouraged.....The guy was only into him self and I being so new to gay sex I was not very encouraged by the whole night.....I phoned the number...Turned out to be a fake....Over the next several months I saw him in the park and he avoided me, and it turns out that the roommate was his boyfriend who was out of town on business....

that night I learned that some guys are only out for sex and that the next time I have a guy with a thing full of lube bent over a bed that it means he wants me to Top him (fuck him, for lack of a better word) Its funny how gay sex is and all the hidden messages that are involved.....One thing I'll never forget is how his toned muscular chest looked with the faint light from the door hitting him......

As I gazed up at him virginal and all full of expectations......I have often thought what would have happened if I figured out what he wanted me to do that night....



A funny story about my second ever experience with a man and my first one night stand or trick as some say.....

After reading this a few times it came to me that when he took out the lube I noticed that there where no condoms offered, I think maybe that night was my first experience being put into the position of un safe sex and that I remember a part of me thinking that something was wrong here....I wonder what changed those many other times in the future, where nothing stopped me not even the thought about what the absence of a condom could mean.....Not to sound cliche but I know now , I really know now

|

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?



Powered by FeedBlitz